LET THEM GROW

by maja osojnik

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1.
06:11
TELL ME / maja osojnik, 2015 I’ll become a frozen lake so you can skate on me, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll become an empty street, so you can walk on me, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become I’ll become a playground, so you can play on me, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll become a stage, so you can act your roles on me, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll become an album with all the images you want from me, tell me, what do you want me to be. Tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me... I’ll become silence so you can sleep in me, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll become your sweetest dreams, so you can feel free, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll become a frozen lake so you can skate on me, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll melt into an ocean, so you can dive in me, tell me, what do you want me to be. I’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become, i’ll become so you can dive into me, so you can feel free, so you can play on me, skate on me, so you can act out your roles on me, all the images you want so you can walk on me, sleep in me, so you can throw all your shit on me Tell me, what the fuck do you want me to be?
2.
05:11
AUTHORITY / maja osojnik, 2014 I let you build this desert and now you call it our home. Towards the end of my hope. You’re wrong and i become less. Nothing to remember, nothing to remain. You have no words for me. For this, for everything, we are out of tune. I am inconsonant with your authority while i hide away your fear, i turn my loudness down and i become less, when i am with you. You ask me, if you made me cry, i lie. Because of you. We built this desert and we named it home. Because of you. I become less for you, just (you) turn me down. Down i fall, Because of you. Inconsonant with your authority. For this, for everything i fall. I am inconsonant with your authority. Because of you. Your words don’t do anything, but fill the empty space between us. For this, for everything we are out of tune. You have no words for me. We built this desert and we named it home. Down i fall, inconsonant with your authority.
3.
01:38
4.
04:31
Condition I. / Maja Osojnik 2015 a constructive debate still not possible, ignorant out of the cradle, IRRELEVANT, who poisoned my milk? the system of YEAHs! feeble-minded phobic bollocks lucy’s an anesthetic to bob’s brain, phoebi has a lazy eye, but she can see through you, you raging beast, candy cane, the first row’s full of crap! time to get kindly dismissed. don’t fight my speed, sticky! Or else... smash it! crash it! hear them sing with lumps in their throat: we own you! you will be informed of nothing! in a tight grip of a massive boredom kevin wants to be punished, lisa has nowhere to go. learn to see! you stand in a draught! (draft) OOPS! a blind date gone bad? you don’t mean shit to me, martha dreams supressed, diffused violence, paul hates prison. maybe we can work something out, MAYBE WE CAN’T, when things go wrong and of course they do. being brave isn’t supposed to be easy, peter cries every day, tom every second, ann is problematic, bertha’s hysterically planning another fight, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU, WE OWN YOU. RACK AND RUIN! finally, lets shake hands no hands involved, another deal for? stick it up your ass, fiction by my will. the sight is cleared, so COME OUT, you rotten cocksucker, here’s your fucking POP SONG.
5.
Hello, I can’t find my head / maja osojnik 2014 And now - we sit - here - and have - nothing - to say - to each other - except - for maybe - a couple - of - confusing truths. - Your questioning face - my - blushing - cheek lashed - from your - and my - own thoughts - and then i - imagine myself - how i - lovingly - but yet - convincingly - scream at you: WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? DON’T – YOU – LET – ME – LEAVE – YOU – LEAVE – ME – LET – ME – LIVE – YOU – LEAVE WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? But the contract says: Sit still, shut up and watch our sweet collective misery. The grounds you walk with me are fake, my words are slippery, but you have to stay, slow down your needs and sabotage and plague (toil) yourself to bleed, hide tears, puke cheap, stay strange to me and creep. NO THRILLS PLEASE IN THIS SHITHOLE. I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD I CAN NOT FIND MY HEAD
6.
NOTHING IS FINISHED, UNTIL YOU SEE IT / MAJA OSOJNIK, 2014 carefully disremembered, ask me all the things that are hard to say. sometimes just skin, love me, love me not. my failing hands, the ends of rain and muted truth. holding my breath till it hurts. are we missing something important? are we? fighting gravity. 4 walls broke. unraveled, revealed: white waves, white waves, white waves, white waves, white waves, white waves, white waves, white waves, white waves, carefully, i am broken. black holes, all the turn-aways disremembered and all the people i am absently watching the days go by, go by, seeing the things as they are. nothing is finished, nothing is finished untill...
7.
05:30
8.
03:34
LET THEM / maja osojnik, 2015 Let them grow, i let them grow my hands, my arms, so i can put them around me to hide WHEN YOU COME I GO Let it go, let it go what is this all that maybe was and now it’s not The blows that split apart my voice has cracked, my heart is pounding questions into lips sewn up. stand up and bow down: hello, to another senseless war, that was applause, applause to all the static minds, estranged we failed the terms of us, you see, i changed. Let it go, let it go, it’s all there is that maybe was and now it’s not Too much time, no time, we took, look, my eyes are still the same, i blame, i blame these hungry needs, they lead to absent days, and absent love please, go back to sleep it’s all arranged, you see, i changed. It’s all there is that maybe was and now it’s not well, just one side of my dress got burned when you turned away Let them grow, i let them grow my hands, my arms, so i can put them around me to hide when you come, i go to pick up your words, where you left them lying like little toys on a piece of paper.
9.
10.
06:14
WAITING / MAJA OSOJNIK, 2014 as the tenderness of a pleasant intoxicated state fades out there’s this muted sadness left behind. one last move and then i freeze, i freeze to pose a pause; my still frame of refusal, this sadness is my cause. today it feels like walking on broken glass and it hurts... my body hurts, when you march through me, a blindfolded army on demand, hunters for colours, hopes and dreams, you force to flee, with the shameful mission to destroy, who you are, who taught you, not to be human? / humans teach hate / my body hurts, when you march through me, a parade from station „ignorant“ to station „failed“. How can you demand my total trust and send me on a shopping spree, while i watch you steal in broad daylight and undisguised with greedy fingers, tacky smiles you trick your crowds, to call you gods while buying likes in cyber space, you give your orders to obey and not to ask. Is this our way of giving up? to see the truth – see nothing? nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing moves... waiting for the sun to fall waiting for the sun to fall waiting for the sun to fall waiting for the sun to fall waiting for the sky to fall my hands will find peace. then you’ll ask me which future shall we choose? and which beginning? with rain in our hair and extended breath without haste for days on our own and we’ll dance without pain on that broken glass.
11.
12.
13.
a lullaby to an unborn child, a love song / maja oojnik, 2014 read both two lines in each verse simultaneously: my sweet little baby / possibly maybe / in search of a smile / wait for me delete, forget / just a dream too weak / the past you fear staring at a vast darkness / nursing my old fear / no silence is silent at nights when all falls asleep the world becomes clear big bird shadow on the wall / your lights go out / and the snow starts to fall the time is high and music is dead / on hot summer days / snow falls (and) every night i’m repeating it all; replacing the forgotten with the selfinvented: my heart beats so loud, i can’t even hear my voice, i’m thinking: „perhaps i will lose my heart in this“ and then i get lost in you. while you draw silently impromptu maps on my hungry skin, i undress my distance beneath layers of fear, naked and liquid the borders of our bodies become unclear and we exchange breathless kisses into sleep.
14.
I was dying, so i am now probably dead / maja osojnik, 2015 too soon, too strange too late to change this path too obvious to ignore, a body too tense, too silent its core too weak to hold an off road map unfolds a life fast forward lived. too hard to bend, too dead to blend into this crowd too slow to dance the lights enhance this thing, my absent me, it’s time to carry out this task, but is it for you too much to ask? why are you pretending not to stare at me? who did dress me up so senselessly? so do i still mean now or was i just meant to be? and what’s with all that whispering? I’M NOT SLEEPING. too new to know, too proud to show, the next page i turn is cleared, the words i owe have disappeared. it’s time to go now, too many flies, who has the coins to put upon my eyes? it’s time to carry out this task, but is it for you too much to ask? why are you pretending not to stare at me? who did dress me up so senselessly? will i ever know again who i was supposed to be? must i still decide what this world is for me? and what’s with all that whispering? I’M NOT SLEEPING.
15.
AUTHORITY / maja osojnik, 2014 I let you build this desert and now you call it our home. Towards the end of my hope. You’re wrong and i become less. Nothing to remember, nothing to remain. You have no words for me. For this, for everything, we are out of tune. I am inconsonant with your authority while i hide away your fear, i turn my loudness down and i become less, when i am with you. You ask me, if you made me cry, i lie. Because of you. We built this desert and we named it home. Because of you. I become less for you, just (you) turn me down. Down i fall, Because of you. Inconsonant with your authority. For this, for everything i fall. I am inconsonant with your authority. Because of you. Your words don’t do anything, but fill the empty space between us. For this, for everything we are out of tune. You have no words for me. We built this desert and we named it home. Down i fall, inconsonant with your authority.
16.

credits

released February 1, 2016

music & lyrics, recorded, edited, produced by maja osojnik between 2013-2015

instruments: vocals, field recordings, paetzold bass recorder, e-bass, melodicas, toys, radios, glockenspiel, cassette recorders, abandoned pianos, installations tubes, electronic setup with dj cd player and different guitar pedals, electronics

sampled artists:
tamara wilhelm - electronics (#4)
manu mayr – double bass (#2, #15,#16)
matija schellander – double bass (#2,#8)
patrick wurzwallner – drums (#8, #9)

main vocal recorded by oliver brunbauer at hotel pupik
mixed by patrick pulsinger at feedback studio I.
mastered & LP cut by rashad becker, D&M
artwork by raumschiff engelmayr
photography by rania moslam

to order a physical hard copy of the record: DBL LP - limited gatefold 12'' vinyl (180g) or a CD, please contact me maja@klingt.org

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maja osojnik Vienna, Austria

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